Friday, June 17, 2011

10 classic Indianisms.......

How to fix grammatically insane phrases found in common Indian English                       

We are a unique species, aren’t we? Not humans. Indians, I mean. No other race speaks or spells like we do.
Take greetings for example.
A friendly clerk asking me for my name is apt to start a conversation with, “What is your good name?” As if I hold that sort of information close to my heart and only divulge my evil pseudonym. Bizarre.
I call these Indianisms.
Which got me thinking about a compilation, a greatest hits of the most hilarious Indianisms out there. And here they are. The most common ones, and my favorites among them.

1. 'Passing out'

When you complete your studies at an educational institution, you graduate from that institution.
You do not "pass out" from that institution.
To "pass out" refers to losing consciousness, like after you get too drunk, though I’m not sure how we managed to connect graduating and intoxication.
Oh wait … of course, poor grades throughout the year could lead to a sudden elation on hearing you’ve passed all of your exams, which could lead to you actually "passing out," but this is rare at best.

2. 'Kindly revert'

One common mistake we make is using the word revert to mean reply or respond.
Revert means "to return to a former state."
I can’t help thinking of a sarcastic answer every time this comes up.
“Please revert at the earliest.”
“Sure, I’ll set my biological clock to regress evolutionarily to my original primitive hydrocarbon state at 1 p.m. today."

3. 'Years back'

If it happened in the past, it happened years ago, not "years back."
Given how common this phrase is, I’m guessing the first person who switched "ago" for "back" probably did it years back. See what I mean?
And speaking of "back," asking someone to use the backside entrance sounds so wrong.
“So when did you buy this car?”
“Oh, years back.”
“Cool, can you open the backside? I’d like to get a load in.”

4. 'Doing the needful'

Try to avoid using the phrase "do the needful." It went out of style decades ago, about the time the British left.
Using it today indicates you are a dinosaur, a dinosaur with bad grammar.
You may use the phrase humorously, to poke fun at such archaic speech, or other dinosaurs.
“Will you do the needful?”
“Of course, and I’ll send you a telegram to let you know it's done too.”

5. 'Discuss about'

“What shall we discuss about today?”
“Let’s discuss about politics. We need a fault-ridden topic to mirror our bad grammar.”
You don't "discuss about" something; you just discuss things.
The word "discuss" means to "talk about". There is no reason to insert the word "about" after "discuss."
That would be like saying "talk about about." Which "brings about" me to my next peeve.


6. 'Order for'

"Hey, let’s order for a pizza."
"Sure, and why not raid a library while we’re about it.”
When you order something, you "order" it, you do not "order for" it.
Who knows when or why we began placing random prepositions after verbs?
Perhaps somewhere in our history someone lost a little faith in the "doing" word and added "for" to make sure their order would reach them. They must have been pretty hungry.

7. 'Do one thing'

When someone approaches you with a query, and your reply begins with the phrase "do one thing," you're doing it wrong.
"Do one thing" is a phrase that does not make sense.
It is an Indianism. It is only understood in India. It is not proper English. It is irritating.
There are better ways to begin a reply. And worst of all, any person who starts a sentence with "do one thing" invariably ends up giving you at least five things to do.
“My computer keeps getting hung.”
“Do one thing. Clear your history. Delete your cookies. Defrag your hardrive. Run a virus check. Restart your computer... .”

8. 'Out of station'

“Sorry I can’t talk right now, I’m out of station.”
“What a coincidence, Vijay, I’m in a station right now.”
Another blast from the past, this one, and also, extremely outdated.
What's wrong with "out of town" or "not in Mumbai" or my favorite "I'm not here"?

9. The big sleep

"I’m going to bed now, sleep is coming."
"OK, say hi to it for me."
While a fan of anthropomorphism, I do have my limits. "Sleep is coming" is taking things a bit too far.
Your life isn’t a poem. You don’t have to give body cycles their own personalities.

10. 'Prepone'

“Let’s prepone the meeting from 11 a.m. to 10 a.m.”
Because the opposite of postpone just has to be prepone, right?
"Prepone" is probably the most famous Indianism of all time; one that I’m proud of, and that I actually support as a new entry to all English dictionaries.
Because it makes sense. Because it fills a gap. Because we need it. We’re Indians, damn it. Students of chaos theory.
We don’t have the time to say silly things like "could you please bring the meeting forward."
Prepone it is.
There are many more pure grammatical "gems" in what we call Indian English. Perhaps in time I’ll list some more. And perhaps in the near future, we’ll get better at English.
Till then, kindly adjust.

My Comments:
Yes, it is a fact that we speak wrong pharses or sentences.This I came to know when I came down to USA.
Passing out , in real sense says, to become unconcious.We say, he paased out from 12th grade.That is wrong English.
When someone is Vomitting, people here never says, vomitting, they say...she /he is throwing out.
So, as I read this article, I thougth I should paste it here for readers to understand how bad we speak English.
I donno, but I am an avid reader of Internet and even books which varies to various subjects and maybe that is the reason I am able to write on many things .Offlate I have not been able to read much other then stock market but I still read something that catch my eyes on internet.........
Yes, but I have a liking for watching movies, watching Cricket matches,listening songs but let me write here that IPL that is played in India has never influenced me to watch it even for 5 mins as I feel that is not a standard of internatinal level.I always feel that IPL is fancied only because film star comes there to support their team and peope are able to see their favourite star on the ground.
Though I have not played any Tennis but I was an avid watcher of Tennis games  and in perticular the Wimbledon.I like the pace and the force at which Tennis is played at Wimbledon.
The reason there is pace and force is because it is played on grass court.So if you can't take the serve of the opposite player you lose.Lately I stopped watching Wimbledon because there is no compitition.The players like Bjorn Borg , Boris Becker,Stephen Edberg, Jimmy Connors,Ivan Lendl, Pat Cash,Mats Wilander are missing.The competition at that time was big.
I remember Ivan Lendl never won Wimbledon Championship and he wanted it so badly.
Once he spoke, take my US open championsship and give me Wimbledon.
There was something extraordinary in each players.
Ivan Lendl won US Championship for many times but Wimbledon was eluding him.US open is played on Flusing Meadow, French Open is played on  Ronald Garros and clay court and Mats Winlander was the Champion there.He will not let anyone win there.
In Tennis, the Grand Slam consist of 4 championship.Austrailian Open, French Open, Wimbledon and US Open.
When Wimbledon was played in that time there was always a suspense.Who will win it.
Stephen Edberg from Sweden was an excellent player.Very cool.Never argue for line calls.Well I can't forget to mention John Mcenore from US.Excellent player and always fight with umpire at Wimbledon for line calls.But he was a brilliant player.Lateron he said he use to argue the verdict of umpires for line calls to disturb opposite player......but he was a great player to watch.Then Boris Becker from Germany comes out of blue and wins the Wimbledon at a very tender age of 16 or 17.It was a treat to watch Boris Becker.
First tournament start with Australian Open, then comes French Open, then comes Wimbledon at centre court and then the last at Flushing Meadow as US Open.Means that is how it is played one after another.
I have seen Mats Winlendar playing on and on and winning French Open as many times.Ivan Lendl winnig US open as many times,Bjorn Borg winning wimbledon as many times which was a record in itself but then it was broken by Pat Samprass.But I never was impressed by Pat Samprass.Ofcorse he was an excellent player but to me he was not tested against strong players.
Well, If I do not write on woman player I am sure some woman bloggers will not like it.....lol
So let me write on them as well.
The best I saw was Billy Gin King , Christ Evert Llyod, Martina Navratilova and that time there was a superb excellent looking player named Gabriela Sabatini from Argentina.
Then came Steffi Graf and she toppled everyone and became top ranked player for many years and then still I use to see the game of Monica Seles who was a beautiful player and won many Grand Slam tournament but was injured when someone stabbed a knife on her back .
Then around same time there came Martina Hingis a very excellent player and played excellently on grass court at Wimbledon as well......
Well friends, I went on and on in Tennis and looks like I will never come out from it.So better I end here.......
I know many readers must be surprised about my interest in various part of games and life and many would feel that how I am able to do that.But that is how I am.I love to enjoy everything which comes in life.
I can talk on and on in any subject for hours togather.

21 comments:

  1. sir do you tract kamshebu ispat m-cap of about 40 cr and a paint divison doing sales of about 150 cr

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  2. Dear Rajeev,

    Its really good post and pleasent surprise for all of us about your knowledge in Tennis. Even I love watch tennis and I will never forget Borris becker win over kevin kureen in 1985 that has sparked my interest in Tennis I still feel Borris was the best player on wimbeldon court, the energy and agressiveness he showed was unforgettable.In recent times I feel Nadal has got that level of energy...............

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  3. Still we are GULAAM..............GULAAM of English..english ki gulami.

    hum angrezo ki gulami se to azaad ho gaye but abhee bhee hum angrezi ke gulam hai...
    71 countries were under britishers/french/dutch/purtgal rule for many years... china, japan are few big names.... you know what they did first just after their independence???? Do you know Mr Rajeev?
    They Freed themselves from English Language.. Yes thats true... Japan Destroyed Convent Schools first

    NO Research can be done in any other lanuguage except your mother tounge... Both Nobel Prizes winner from india wrote their thesis in Bangla... uske baad koi nahi aya... kyuki sabne english ne likhna shuru kiya.. we cant express ourselves best in english... If you ask any chinese How come did you grown so fast, they reply is that "We have made chinese language as our original language, their national language, language for all R&D Activities, we made chinese language as official language of all technical studies, we adopted chinese language as our common language"......

    Britishers, Purtgal, Dutch both three rules japan for long time... but they removed English form every part of their countries just after their independency. See now Japan Economy...

    You know the real motive behind the formation of Convent Schools...???? Do you really know Rajeev??? aapko pata hee nahi hoga... google par bhee search maaroge tab bhee nahi milega...

    Japanese economist says that WillPower ka sabse bada yogdaan hota hai kisi bhee country ko powerful banane mein.... Sankalp Shakti... yes.. Sankalp Shakti... Aur ye Willpower ya Sankalp Shakti bas other tounge se hee aatee hai... Sankalp Shakti kisi aur bhasha mein nahi lee jaa sakti.... vo poori hee nahi hoti....

    Brazil never adopted ENGLISH though its borders touches America.... aap ko khud pata hai Brazil ki economy ka...

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  4. -------
    Chalo ye to bade desh ho gaye.... ap chhote countries ki baat karte hai...


    Finland, Denmark, Norway... aise duniya mein 24 bahut chhote chhote desh hai.. jo bahut chhote hai.. 30 lakh se kam population vaale... in desho ki kahani padho.... finland ne SANKAlp liya hai.. 100 saal purana sankalp.. ajaazi ke baad unhone decide kiya ki vo kabhee kisi VIDESHI BHASHA mein koi kaam nahi karenge... they will involve FINISH language in every aspect...in everything..... Finland loves their mothertounge like a mother loves his baby.... Please note that Finland is not too far from Britain... Britain always make pressure on finland to make english as official language.. but finland people says that they are independent till they will follow their mothertoungue... They dont hve Army will no country is able to attack them...

    Denmark... Every thing in in Dutch Language... Dutch is the language which has least number of words... but in Denmark higher studies they adopted Dutch language.. they are not ready to compromise on their language...

    jaise hamari mother(Maa) kaise bhee ho but vo hamare liye sabse sundar hoti hai... we can never compare out mother with anyone's...vaise hee ek country ke liye uski mothertounge uski mother jaise hoti hai.. kabhee Denmark Jao... Kabhee Finland Jao.. Kabhee china jao... pata chal jaega ki un logo ne apni Mother(Maa) ko kitna pyar diya hai....

    Sweden.jab se azaad hua hai tab se hee they adopted Swedish language... still they are using swedish language... nobody speaks english there...

    India has biggest natural resources, largest doctors, largest engineers, largest farmers, largest workers.BUT HINDI ko national language banane ke maamle mein hum log sabse FISADDI hai.We are Very Poor really
    Jab tak hamari national language SANSKRIT rahi tab tak hum sone ke chidiya rahe.... kuch pata hai aapko... From to the time of Chanakya to Seventh Century... And there is no Doubt and debate about that... World knows this...


    aajkal to institute khul gaye hai jo bolte hai "LEANR ENGLISH IN 6 WEEKS"...."LEARN ENGLISH IN 2 months"... etc etc... so jab english hum 2 mahine min seekh sakte hai to kyu uske piche bhaage......

    jaise hee bharat se sanskrit khatam hui vaise hee bahar se attack hone lage india par....in seventh century mohammad bin kasim attacked, them mehmood gajnavi, then taimoor lang, then nadir shah.. uske baad aur bhee bahut.. ahmed shah abdali, babar, purtgali, britishers... sab SANSKRIT ke khatam hone ke baad huye.... jab tan SANSKRIT rahi tab tak hum indenpendence rahe.... uske baad koi research nahi hui.... ek bhee achhi research nahi...

    Duniya aaj bhee maanti hai YOGA ko, Ayurvde ko, Hamare Ved ko... sab SANSKRIT mein likhe huye hai....

    Mein aapse Request karti hu ki ENGLISH KI GULAAMI KARNE VAALE Articles mat likho......plssssss

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  5. I'm quite agreed with PRIYA JI though she has given few wrong information like BRAZIL share border with AMERICA (USA), she can check global map for this.She has written that DENMARK use DUTCH language but I believe it should be NEDTHERLAND or HOLLAND not DENMARK. Anyway in otherthing I am agreed with PRIYA JI. I'm an engineer working in aerospace field, we have regular interaction with RUSSIAN Aero-engineers of SUKHOI-30MKI, Those Russian engineers don't know how to speak English but know how to use their brain to design state of art aircraft like SUKHOI and other 5th generation aircrafts.

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  6. Denmark=Danish, Netehrland=Dutch... its not matter ki kaha kya bola jata hai.. baat ye hai ki vo log apni mothertounge se kitna love karte hai...

    I dont know Mr Rajeev has got time to visit Europe. Some of my friends are in Europe... they observed a very common thing among all countries of europe,.. "NUM OF DENTISTS IN EUROPE IS MORE THEN NORMAL DOCTORS/PHYSICIANS"... strange naa? One more thing.. Dentists in Europe and US earn more than a normal physician...
    My Friends were surprised by this fact... They tried to get answer of this....
    Ek din unhone apne office mein pucha ki aisa kyu hai ki europe mein dentist jyada hai... You Will not believe what reply they got.... Really you wont believe.. but its truth... THEY SAID THAT THEY DONT HAVE NEEM... Thats why here dentists are more and dental problems are more... They are Sick of these toothpaste...

    How insulting is for us.. ek european banda bol rha hai ki unke paas neem hota to aaj vaha itne dental problem nahi hote... Aur Hum Log... Jo UNILEVER ne launch kar diya usi ke peeche bhaage jaa rahe hai... Colgate is Best for us.. because UK ki company ne banaya hai....ab ek naya product SENSODYNE... sab uske piche pad gaye... hota kuch nahi.. sab ANGREZI ki MARKETING hai.....
    Sorry mein topic ko kaha se kaha le gayee....

    Now coming back to POOR LANGUAGE ENGLISH....
    Koreans dont know English, they dont speak english(very rarely) but STILL Samsung, LG, Hyundai are ruling world.. Why??? jab english nahi to kuch nahi hona chahiye naa???
    China , Taipei... sab ka pata hai sab ko.. kabhee vaha jaake dekho... Restuerent mein Menu English ka nahi hoga......

    To be continued(if somebody writes back something)...

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  7. Priya,
    My post was not for supporting English.I posted it to those people who wants to speak English needs to speak correctly.
    Nowhere I had written one should speak English.I haven't forced anyone in my post , had I?
    Over and above that we have no mothertongue in India. Means we have many state and they have their own mothertongue.Madarasi, Tamil, Kelarist, Maharashtrain, Gujarati, Hindi, Punjabi , Rajastahni etc etc.....so as a whole what a Tamilian will do?Do things in Tamil, then who will understand that ?What a Maharashtrian will do?Write only in Marathi, then who will understand that?
    And leave the mothertongue, we have so many scams in our country , if we love our country then we do not do that, right?
    We are suppose to stick with our language.If I say, well my mothertongue is only Gujarati I will write in Gujarati only then who will understand my writing? Not all people in India knows Gujarati.So I have to write in such a way that everyone can understand it.It looks like you understood me wrong here.Well, as you asked I have never been to Holland or whatever countries you mentioned and hence my knowledge is limited against yours.
    Even when Korea makes things like cars etc, the information comes in English for users and not in Korean language, because they have to sell to non Korean people around the world.Even if Japan is selling something after producing they give information in English.
    Crude price is quoted in dollars only because that is the currency the world is using for trading in crude.Is it possible for India to tell the world that as our curreccy is Rupee we will only trade in rupee?NO.
    Does China says so?Do Korea says so?Does Japan says so that well we will deal in crude in only our currency?
    I hope you understand now what I mean to say...and even after reading my reply if u feel the otherway, u r still free to think that way....
    Thanks....

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  8. Priya whenever someone talks something good about india, the only counter argument will be is scams in india as if USA is completely scam free, the biggest scams the world has ever seen is the 2008 recession which had it's origin in USA, india is far better compared to that. Well one quality of indians that you and rajeev missed to mention is the "boot licking" quality of indians, we feel proud in licking the boots of angrez. And when someone like ratan tata points out the laziness of USA/UK employees that they don't give 100% to their work like indians do, then everyone runs after him. If they don't work, its their healthy work culture and if we don't work its the lack of character. If this is not boot licking then what is it. Indians first muster the courage to call a spade as spade, ratan tata has done that, other businessmen will follow, its the time of indians to dictate terms to them like its now with ICC. A british game which is fully dominated by india.

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  9. Very open ended discussion and every one is correct here (why english/why not english). But as time passes eveyone has to converge and that's the law of evolution.."world is flat".
    At Convergence point there has to be one language to communicate and as of now fortunately/unfortunately it's english. It's not about english...it's about the dominance whoever is powerful will take the charge. And basically it's like "pyasa kunwe ke paas jata hai" so if I am the source and you want something from me you have to modify yourself to get that thing. And if you don't you might loose because you are needy here not me. So I think it's evolutionary process and keep on changing as per dominance/requirement. I learned Hindi/English to survive and might have to learn something else with time....where world goes (struggle for existence :)).

    Thanks,
    Om's

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  10. Dear sir,
    If you dont mind,
    I want to know your personal holdings of all the stocks for long term.
    Hope, you will make us know.
    Thanks in advance.

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  11. pruthvi,
    I am a very small player in market and u should have not asked me about it.
    Atleast you need to have the courtesy to ask about my PF on my mailid and not in open here.
    Even Ramesh Damani do not use to say how much he holds and what he holds, then how u all can expect me to write it here....
    Looks like liberty is turning in to liecence......I have given all liberty to my readers but they are forgetting what to write , what to ask and keeps on writing without looking what they are doing.....
    The dignity that needs to kept is missing here.The respect one need to observe is missing.The EGO is taking over the Wisdom.Losing the reason to understand what needs to be written and what needs to be taken out...

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  12. Hi Rajeev, I know you are actually indicating me when u r talking about liberty, I did not mean the boot licking word for you, that was a generalized thing that I observed in India and expressed it here, but if I had hurt you then I really apologize for it. I don't take part in discussion to personally attack anyone on this forum, that was really a generalized term and of-course I have not stooped to the level that I will use such a word for you. I again apologize.

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  13. Sukanya,
    The commnets was not directed to anyone personally.It was a general comment meant for everyone.
    Only thing I wanted to say,don't get carried away by your emotions and write something which is not supposed to be written.
    I had always written here, please read my post 2-3 times and try to understand what I am saying and then write.After reading my post wait for 3-4 hrs, then write.
    The thing happens is we miss other points while emphasizing on what else is written.
    If I take an example for what you wrote, you said, as soon as someone talk about India, scams example comes out, which I wrote to Priya , but then you missed what other things I wrote and you didn't answer that.
    I have seen readers ignoring such things.They give answers what they feel about and ignore the other part of the comment.When I explained about different language what is your answer?I gave example of currency , what is your answer?I gave example of Korea and Japan product they sell with English instruction, what is your answer.
    Sukanya, reply in totallity.Don't reply in part of a whole comments.What readers do is they reply only that part which they do not like without properly interpreting what is written....
    You and anyone here are most welcome to give comments but I request everyone here , please understand the post and then give comments.Don't give replies on part of the post.That is half reply....and can be wrong too....
    I also mentioned that I never wrote I support English here.That was seen in the post as well then why there is so much a discussion on a topic which I haven't mentioned at all?

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  14. Have you ever Write about hindi language?

    Have you ever posted anything on the power of sanskrit?

    Have you ever posted that Germany has started Universities to tough sanskrit?

    You are counting goodness of english yet not forcing anybody to speak english... ambiguity..

    Do you know that Madrasi, Gujarati, Tamil, Punjabi are regional Language?

    Do you know that Hindi is included in all curriculums of school across the country?? Why it has included... Because its our national language....

    I am surprised to see your comment that ek marathi agar marathi mein likhega to kaun samjhega usko... you dont know history... Ravindra Nath Tagore wrote his thesis in Bangla.. Sir Venkat Raman also wrote in Bangla... Then how come Nobel committee recognized them...???? I am very sorry to say that you feel that Recognition and Concepts can only be understood only in english....

    Koreans kept their every research in korean.. Everything in korean.. koreans knows that Indians think Hindi as poor language thats why they released everything in English here.. Wheares in Chine they released everything in Chinese Language, In Denmark they released everthing in danish language... How poor we are really... I feel sorry about this...

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  15. Priya, Now I will have to write what readers will tell me to write?
    Have I made a crime writing the last post?What am I to do?I can't even write what I feel like writing on my own blog what I wants to?
    You are coming too hard on me like I have made the biggest blunder of my life writing this post and replying comments........looks like this has become a personal war or challenge....I don't want to drag myself in it.....
    This will be my last reply here ....to you or anyone......

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  16. Rajeev will it be possible for u to create platform like equitydesk?
    That platform will bring more participants and lead to healthy discussions.
    You have all capability to lead platform like equitydesk

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  17. Rajeev, any views on Transwarranty Finance Limited. Promoters have good background

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  18. Rajeev, any views on Kerala Ayurveda. Promoters just dont have good background but they have great background. But nothing impressive in their financial statements. Recently Tata GB signed MOU with them. *********Will it be game changing?********* Seems like their US businesses have been culprit.

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  19. sameer,
    I do not track both so no view

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  20. Hi Rajeev,
    if you do track Oriental Carbon & Chemicals Ltd. [OCCL],
    do you think it has any multi-bagger potential?
    Regards,
    Vikas

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  21. vikas,
    no clue about carbon ind so no view...

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